Stats

Ok, so I did tell myself to try and stay away from stats, as it can so often send me down the whole numbers game route and when I look back at my eating disorder days I wince at the amount of time I spent counting calories, weighing myself, calculating food diaries etc...

But I do think it's important to keep track of how you're doing and if I'm ever going to shift this bulk I have to know there's some sort of progress happening.

Because I used to have binge eating tendencies alongside so many other disordered eating habits my weight has been all over the place, and although my highest weight is embarrassingly heavy, as is my current weight,  I'm going to include them  just so I can remind myself NEVER to be that big again.

H: 5"2 (shorty)
LW: 83lbs
HW: 120lbs
CW: 114lbs
CGW: 105lbs
UGW: 90lbs

To think that I have to lose just over a stone to get under 100 again is terrifying. But I will get there because I have to.

No one tells you that when you recover, you suddenly don't even know how to dress anymore. This body does not fit me, it's too big. I can't find clothes that look right, I can't even sit in college without feeling too big for the chair and uncomfortable.

I have to go back to old ways, I can't just 'diet'. I'm too much of an all or nothing person for that...